Brian McFadden

Poetry

Photo by Andriyko Podilnyk on Unsplash

Sometimes all you need to recover
your joy is to be neither holy nor wise.

Just inhabit that quiet world behind your face
where the awkward and tangled parts of you
loosen and fall into rhythm.

How you get there is up to you,
but once you arrive,

you’ll discover that this land
is not governed by good or evil.

I’ll meet you there.

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Photo by Parsa Mahmoudi on Unsplash

the quest for wisdom has stretched out for thousands of miles
in the wrong direction.

it is time for us to turn back and comb through the book
of our heart.

tides of greed will recede when we discover that a single page can direct the rest of our days.

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Photo by Frank Flores on Unsplash

Approaching the second mountain of this life, I long for peace, and today, the guidance comes from the parrots in the trees clicking their tongues. They are never confused nor tire of being what they are.

In the tiny apartment by the river, the heat has no consideration and burns through all my delusions. All that is left are the seeds of an unlived life waiting to be watered.

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Poetry

Photo by Rich Soul on Unsplash

It was pouring so hard, that I could no longer distinguish the rain from my tears, but I stood there anyway.

After a while, the urge to run washed away. Then, before me was the goal to make this journey free of suffering.

And to realize I had failed at this mission was to also discover the raft that would carry me the rest of the way.

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Me walking through a fruit grove in San Ignacio, Belize

When you have walked yourself to the edge of insanity,
and your bruised soul cannot access any other tools than despair,
smile at your pain and hold it like it is your own child.

Do this as long as you can. The world will go on, but you will stop and give yourself a chance to remember this:

“When the search ends, you find what you need.
When your opinions fade, clarity returns.”

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I bring myself to the Macal gnarled and knotted from the American Grind.

Maps soon become obsolete and the compass I relied on for so long has drowned itself in time.

I stay until we merge and the sound of raw water rouses the blood rivers running through my flesh.

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